Ingredients:
1 C water
1 C sugar
4 large eggs
2 C dried fruit
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. Salt
1 C brown sugar lemon juice nuts
1 FULL bottle of your favorite whiskey
Directions:
Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Take a large bowl.
Check the whiskey again to be sure that it is of the highest quality.
Pour 1 level cup and drink. Repeat if necessary.
Turn on the electric mixer. Beat 1 C of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add 1 tsp sugar and beat again.
Make sure the whiskey is still OK. Cry another tup.
Turn off the mixer. Break two legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift the cups of salt. Or something. Who cares.
Check the whiskey again.
Now lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one tablespoon of sugar or sift the something. Whatever you can find.
Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.
Don't forget to beat off the turner.
Throw the bowl out of the window.
Check the whiskey again.
Go to bed. Who the hell likes fruitcake anyway?
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Before going to bed try another cup, straight, no ice, no nothing. The next morning check out if the cake is still on the sidewalk.
check the whiskey again
whaddahell is this woman is doing in your bed?
was she pretty yesterday?
is she still pretty today?
if positive check the whiskey and go have some fun with her
if negative, tell the woman to go buy yourself more whiskey
and don´t forget to offer her a piece of the fruitcake.
Meu pra quem ja experimentou essa craca... vai ver que essa é a melhor receita de fruitcake do mundo.
Is the woman part of the recipe?
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